The Columbia County Fair starts Wednesday, August 27th until Monday, September 1st at the Fair Grounds in Chatham
Any former New York City dweller who wants to make country upstate living their new life, must attend a county fair. County Fairs will push you outside of your bubble and comfort zone. The County Fair forces us outside of our social media algorithms, which are programmed to show us more of the same. Social media keeps us in our bubbles. But, at the County Fair, you will come face-to-face with your neighbors, even if you’ve been avoiding them.
You can stroll Warren Street and be amused by the quaintness of the shops and restaurants, breathe fresh air and sip delicious affogato. However, if you want a full upstate experience, especially a Columbia County experience, then you must eat a pepperoni heel, or a least try a fried Oreo cookie.
People Watching
There’s no better place to people watch than the county fair. You’ll find couples wearing crocs and SpongeBob Squarepants pajama pants as daywear alongside gender neutral sometimes-heterosexual couples in head-to-toe beige and man-buns. Both couples will be waiting on the same line with their children for the kiddie roller coaster caterpillar ride.
You’ll see groups of high school teenagers, parentless, screaming with hormones and emotions. It’s their last weekend of summer before school starts – so much has happened, and so much will happen in their young lives. Each day is still filled with limitless possibility, hope, gossip, and potential romance. Dozens of romances either start or finish at the County Fair daily. Did you see so-and-so holding hands with so-and-so in the chicken pavilion? Oh the drama!
Animals
How could you not pet a cow, or touch a goat’s horn, or feel a camel’s lips as it licks the feed out or your hands? Have you had a baby kangaroo jump into your sweatshirt pouch? Find a pig race and place make-believe bets on the swine winner.
For many of the farm animals, though, the County Fair is their last stop before the euphemistic “farm upstate”. Consider a donation to PETA or the Farm Animal Sanctuary, or even our local Animal Kind or Human Society shelters.
Fair Food
Simple and delicious.
The pepperoni heel is a Columbia County original and staple. You have not lived in Columbia County until you’ve tried it. I would love to have a roasted Brussels sprouts booth at the Columbia County Fair, this way, I could pretend I’m being healthy. You must travel to go to the Dutchess County Fair for those sprouts. It’s almost worth the trip.
If you are going to try something fried, try to find something freshly-fried. It will taste amazing and you may still regret your fried decisions later in the evening.
As a former Long Islander, I feel obligated to remind people that the lemon-shaped lemon cart is called, architecturally, a “Duck”. Ducks, named after the Long Island Big Duck in Flanders, are structures that are shaped like everyday objects.
Arts and Crafts Booths
The Arts and Crafts tents are the unsung heroines of County Fairs. People spend countless hours quilting, needle-pointing, crafting, and baking to win a ribbon – and bragging rights.
As one of the Columbia County Fair’s cookie judges, I can attest that a lot of work goes into those sometimes overlooked booths.
The Demolition Derby
The Columbia County Fair is unique. It is one of the few nearby fairs that has a demolition derby arena. Neither the Dutchess County, Sunshine Fair (Schoharie County), the Altamont Fair, nor the Big E in Massachusetts have demolition derby arenas.
Why have you not gone yet? It is fascinating. It’s like watching a literal train wreck, mixed with a dash of Mad Max and the Thunderdome. If you ask around, you will be less then three degrees of separation from knowing someone with a family member in a car.
The Rides
The purpose of this post is to push you outside of your bubble and comfort zone and into the County Fair. Go see your neighbors and eat some fried dough. There are boundaries. If you want to go on the rides, great, I’ll hold your bag and wait for you until you’re done. If you don’t want to go on the rides, fine, let’s go see the chickens instead.
I’m not going to convince anyone to go on a ride if they’re hesitant. The ride may only last for three minutes, but no one wants to sit with a friend for an hour and a half while they lay in a fetal position in the corner of an arts and crafts booth because they’re too sick and dizzy.
Know your limits.
Photo from the Susanne Bartsch night at Bard Spiegeltent